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There's another roll of nausea between the pain and the vivid impossibility of the memory. Her ankle throbs in sympathy with the picture in her mind and she screws her eyes shut against the pain and the sight of blood and something shattering.

The crack earns a laugh that is more felt than heard, but it's the first thing that gets her to look at Togusa since he arrived.

"Careful. I might have to break my 'No Chase' rule for you."

A bit morbid considering how she'd gotten herself into this predicament, but confirmation. She's not so busted up that she can't tease him back, so she'll be alright, probably. Her treatment of her ankle is ginger, but somehow everything is still facing the right way. The sweatpants are hiding the worst of the swelling though and she's not really looking forward to that revelation.

"So are we doing this officially, or do you know a guy?"

The smallest relieved smile passes over Togusa’s face. There’s Mariko. It’s going to be okay.

Togusa moves to the driver side of the car and gets in. He eyes Mariko cautiously, eyebrows high. “Oh, I know a guy, but you’re not gonna like it. There’d be a price involved.” He glances down at what he can see of her leg. “And if that’s a break, then no way.” He will of course not mention out loud that he’s thinking of taking her to her favorite person, Ardyn Izunia.

“Other option is official, but less so? Dr. Lucian Trevelyan, he’s out of the loop, not on the app anymore. but he still remembers all of us cops, still runs his after hours clinic.” He’s the doctor that the guys go to see if they’re not quite sure they want something immediately reported back to the Precinct.

Mariko thinks, or at least tries to, as she settles into the seat of the car. She feels tired for the first time in a long while and this time when she closes her eyes it feels like the memory plays in a dreamlike haze as she grips the door a little harder.

The man is falling so far it feels like he's flying. She's watching -- searching -- aiming down the barrel of her gun and she fires as easily as breathing. His foot just barely touches the rooftop of the impossibly far away building and suddenly his ankle explodes. He'll never walk again, she's pretty sure.

And she feels nothing.

She's never been squeamish a day in her life, but the absence of feeling, the casual. Something about that makes the bottom of her stomach drop and sends her leaning out of the car, retching.

Edited 2017-11-20 22:44 (UTC)

"Mariko!" He lets out a startled cry as Mariko proves she is worse off than she is letting on. A hand briefly reaches for hers, just a quick squeeze, an attempt to bring her back to the moment. Far more worried for his friend than his car. Well, that settles it, Togusa's taking her to Dr. Trevelyan. If it's less clear what's wrong with her, or she's having this bad a reaction to the pain, he isn't inflicting this on Ardyn.

"Hang on." He isn't driving roughly, isn't letting the slight burst of panic affect their movement on the road. He pauses extra-long at a stop light, and for a few seconds, it looks like he's staring off into the distance. He only dares try to send anything while the car isn't moving.

By the time they're halfway there, he's gotten his answer. "Lucian will wait for us," he assures Mariko quietly. He never touched his phone throughout that. She knows the capability, but maybe she hasn't seen this side of it before. Too late now.

Mariko accepts the comfort momentarily, wiping at her mouth with the back of her sleeve before settling back into the seat and nearly slamming the door. She's glad that Togusa isn't coddling her and glad that he makes the call on where she's getting patched up.

"I think something's wrong with me..."

Her voice is quiet and far too composed as the questions begin to eat at her. Why did I shoot him? How did I even make that shot?

"I watched him fall a full story and shot him as soon as he touched the roof. Only it wasn't the person I was chasing."

She presses her knuckles inbetween her brows and sighs, long and weary.

"I'm seeing things, but I felt the gun in my hands, Togusa."

Togusa's grip on the wheel briefly tightens, and he does a cautious double-take when she speaks, but he holds his silence until she finishes. Oh. "Hell," he mutters.

"There's nothing wrong with you, there's something wrong with Retrosepc." He is quick to put that out there, with a bitter tone. It's the line that Togusa has been taking all this time, and he'll stand fast to it.

"This is a part of what everyone has been talking about. And I'm sorry that you're another person getting memories that are- violent." There's a high concentration of people who have just had the most questionable lives, according to Retrospec. "They're going to keep this up, shoving the scenes of another life on you, trying to convince you that they're yours." There's something about seeing this affect Mariko so rawly that angers Togusa in a way he doesn't always get when he's giving this talk.

His insistence makes her flinch and for a moment the world spins again with a different memory.

This one she knows happened, in all of it's terrifying honesty. She'd seen a gun pointed at the one person she couldn't fathom losing and in a moment of fury she ruined everything. White-knuckling the door, she lets out a low sigh that sounds more akin to a growl.

Togusa always believed the best in people and she was sure it was going to get him hurt one day.

"I know what I'm capable of." Her voice is low and thick with revulsion. "It wasn't far off."

Togusa's shoulders visibly slump, but he cautiously eyes her again, any time he can afford to take his eyes off the road.

"Right. You're not one of the teenagers I can win over with the idea that it's a good thing most people don't know what they're capable of." It's almost a little refreshing.

"I'm going to say these words out loud. Even though I know nobody's following them, even me. But we've got enough of a burden to carry in our own lives, don't rush to pick up one that Retrospec is showing you."

There is a pause, a stretch of silence while Togusa continues to guide the car. "That said, you were really chasing somebody when this hit?" He can send Fynn or Frederick a message with just a thought, get them to take a spin past that block, just in case.

God, when has she ever felt this tired. As the lights pass by outside of the car, she shifts and forces herself to sit up. It puts just enough pressure on her ankle to be uncomfortable and will help keep her from drifting too badly.

"I know. It's just annoying."

In the silence, Mariko's thoughts drift to the phantom feeling of the gun in her hands and that Murdock was right. Or was probably right. Anyone who could disable a man like that would likely have little problem killing and it wasn't a far stretch in her opinion. But all the navel gazing in the world couldn't solve the first big puzzle.

How had she made a shot like that without a rifle?

Distracted, she makes a noise of affirmation at the question. "One of the older ladies noticed some creep doing parkour at weird hours near the office. I thought it might have been one of the kids running around with new powers - didn't want to put in a trespassing tip if I didn't have to."

She does look over at Togusa, mildly curious at his reaction to that before continuing.

"Whoever it was bolted after I tried talking and I tried to follow. Apparently I used all my youthful resilience on that last night of drinking."

That is a deeply unimpressed frown in response to Mariko's words, and culprits start flitting through his head. Dante's still too wrecked, maybe Eleanor had some new capabilities? What about what Noctis had been trying to describe to him?

A sigh. "I appreciate that," muttered. He'll get to the bottom of it, if he has to. Cancel the thought to Fynn, though, any one of those kids would be long gone by now.

"Because you're so old," Togusa shakes his head. "We'll get you fixed up in no time. 'Dad' will have to go yell at the kids later."

Storefronts and offices, apartments and houses drift by as Mariko smirks at his grousing, watching the streets as they drive. It's pretty, almost comforting as Togusa drives.

"Christmas cake and then some."

They ride quietly as she considers the lay of the land. So many details are getting lost in the chaos of these burgeoning memories and she can't help but wonder if there will be an uptick in business. She presses her lips together in thought - there will likely be an upswing in leads that last about as long as a banana.

Back to old habits it is.

"Have you gotten anything big yet?"

Edited 2017-11-24 08:22 (UTC)

Mariko's question is curious, and there are certainly some topics that Togusa could pick that would keep to the more somber mood in the car.

"Memories, or the changes? You were there for the big one," Togusa waves a hand at his head. "Machines in my head, giving me access to Retrospec at all times. I can probably directly access the net, but it feels like there's something still missing for that." A frown.

But for memories? Mariko's already almost sick. Although there is the one that has been pressing at his mind, he has shared it with no one, and he'll keep it to himself again. So, something more lighthearted.

He thoughtlessly charges forwards. "Spider robot tanks. With gatling guns." Togusa doesn't check for Mariko's reaction before he just keeps talking. "They're twice the size of this car, but people could ride in them. Use the little spider legs to go up the sides of buildings, they were way more agile than you would think. Had a rudimentary AI, too. But I think it was kind of childlike."

Pause. "And they sing."

"From that night that we certainly weren't drinking to forget?"

Mariko places the night, a little over a month and a half ago. She thought it a symptom of over-indulgence, but if Retrospec could alter someone in their sleep...

Her stomach lurched momentarily.

Togusa describes spider tanks without flinching; combat equipped and able to support passengers. Hyper-mobile, thanks to copying mother nature and rudimentary, childlike intelligence. The thought of a machine asking why the sky was blue or how cars worked prompted a smile.

And then Togusa mentioned singing and Mariko, kind of lost it for a moment.

There was no guffawing, she was far too tired for that - but for the first time in a while, Togusa drew a bit of actual laughter.

"Togusa, you have to promise me something right now. If you get one of these things, I have to see it first, okay?"

Togusa nods in confirmation. The strangeness of that morning has only persisted, and he is actually starting to get used to the change.

He's trying not to get bothered by it.

Which is why the Tachikomas are such a good topic change. He laughs and shakes his head. "I promise. But if I get one of those, Daisuke's going to be jealous." The mental image of Daisuke pouting at Togusa's new 'pet' is far too amusing.

They're close, now. Togusa starts to slow the car. "Here we go. Lucian- he forgets the app, but he's a good man. He won't ask questions, anyway." They are heading not to a hospital, but to a small clinic, the kind with the doctor's own apartment above it.

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