standalonehuman | Recolle IC Inbox

[There's not going to be a response from Dante for a long moment. What can he say to that? Because Togusa's right, he can't believe him, but at the same time... what he's saying makes sense, too.

"You would have died for him, I know if you had control over it, you would have picked yourself over him every time."

He would have. If there was anything he could have done--for either Toushiro or Ryoji--he would've done it in a heartbeat. It's not right, when he could've died and there are only a few people that might have missed him. Ryoji's left so many people behind grieving over him, and Toushiro... Toushiro was so scared. Even if he's come back to life now, he still died. He's still got to go through the rest of his life remembering what it was like.

Finally, Togusa will get a single question in response.]

how od you handle ti

Edited 2017-09-03 18:06 (UTC)

[Togusa's answer to this is going to be different than some other people's. Because he can't give Dante the wishful thinking answer on this one, the hope that he never has to deal with this again.]

You learn, and you hang on to it for next time.

A lot of people go through life never knowing what they're capable of, because they never find themselves in a situation with such high stakes. And that's a good thing. But now that you know, you can take comfort in it.

Sitting and getting lost in what you could have done, what you think you should have done, that's where you're going to hurt yourself.

[It's more helpful than some of the other answers he's gotten, honestly. Too many people just want to tell him that it wasn't his fault and leave it at that. And that... that just leaves too many uncertainties, too much doubt.]

why do yuo think uve been drinking so muhc

i dont want to htink about it

or ryuoji or ritsu or freya ir yuri or anything that happend

i just want to forget lal of it

It's not the fact that you're drinking that worries me, it's that you're directly trying to use it as a coping mechanism.

It's going to start to get less effective over time.

For tonight, drink away, hell, you're at a party.

But this is exactly the pattern that burns out good cops later in their careers.

i knwo

[No, that's not right.]

i know

i wasnt gonna drink todya until the party, i dont want it truning into a habit
but i tried to call ari
when i ran awya a fwe months go shed been woride even thoguh i told her i as leaving town and it was only a few days
this tiem itd been a month sinec id caled her

she doesnt remember anything
she ddint even notice we weer all missign

[Does Togusa even know who Ari is (was)? Dante doesn't know, and it's the farthest thought from his mind right now, frankly.]

Fuck.

Never mind, you've earned it.

I'm so damn sorry, Dante. I know it feels empty, but I am.

Gentiana. She dropped off, she doesn't remember a thing, either.

So. I get it. Hard not to feel damn helpless about the whole thing.

yyeah

if it ahd been one hting i couldve handeld it

but first toushrio then the ghsots possoessing us and then the wriath adn ryoji

i lost evyerthing id gottne back icouldnt summo nmy sword to fight

the aslt stuf fi remembered last month

ari

its too mucj

[Christ. He couldn't save two friends.]

It is. It's more than anyone should have to handle.

What you did mattered. You were still here when we needed you, you helped take out that monster, and there's an ocean out there again thanks to you.

But even that doesn't feel good enough, I know. It's not like the good and bad balance each other out, they both just exist.

So don't discount what you're feeling.

tis workded for this lngo
i used to be betetr at ti
o blame yuo and the rpof nad grel land prompto

[It's. Kind of a joke? But also not. And a bad attempt at one, besides.]

I'll take that blame, gladly.

[There's an urge in there to make fun of the 19 year-old hardened drinker, but now isn't the time. Just put that in my pocket for later.]

It'll keep for tonight. I'm not gonna. Give you any more crap about it, okay?

I'm still here, long as you need me.

[He means discounting his feelings!!!! Although considering he shamed Fynn in alcohol knowledge, he'd probably contest the teasing, too.]

ok

thansk togusa

*thanks

[It's important.]

Recolle IC Inbox

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject