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[standalonehuman]

Togusa

This is Togusa. Feel free to message me at any time.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[standalonehuman]

Okay.

[And, as Togusa feared, Shinji jumps straight onto the worst topic. Well, he wouldn't have to reach out to someone if it wasn't something heavy.]

I remember.

I guess you remembered something else about it?

[spirithacker]

y

b4 i only remembered getting stabbed through
+ another memory was getting ready for dying as some plan
but i now i remembered a little after the stabbing
the plan worked

i died so somebody else would live
bcuz they cried for me
nobody else wouldve cried

[standalonehuman]

Shinji. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you have to see any of this.

You shouldn't have had to make a choice like that. Nobody should, but especially you.

There aren't many people who would have the bravery to choose themselves over someone else, though. I know it's cold comfort.

[spirithacker]

ty

[It seems like the answer to that, even if this is all a lot and Shinji hardly knows what else he should - or even could - say.]

in shows/games/whatever when somebody does a heroic sacrifice its rly sad but theyre not scared
i was scared

im scared now

[standalonehuman]

It's okay to be scared. Real people, when they meet a moment like that. They're scared. Everybody gets scared.

It doesn't mean it's a bad thing, and it doesn't mean you're not strong. It's what bravery is, going ahead and doing something even though you're scared.

But you don't have to be brave right now.

[spirithacker]

[If Shinji sniffles a little, Togusa will never know. That's why texting is better.]

i gotta
bad stuff happens all the time here
so i gotta help even if its scary

but i dont wanna have to do that again

[standalonehuman]

You do not have to. Period.
There's nobody who would tell you that you have to.

Even Retrospec, when they're asking for our help, they always make sure we choose it.

Just because Retrospec has shoved all this on you, you don't have to do anything about it. You have a choice in the matter.

You don't have to risk your life.

[spirithacker]

i know but
idk
i dont like not doing anything
esp when other people are risking their lives

[standalonehuman]

If it's something that you really want, then, yes. Do it.

But only if you are making the choice. I'll keep reminding you that you don't have to.

Adults make that choice all the time. Since kids have so many fewer choices in the rest of their lives, I worry more that you wouldn't feel like you have the option to say no. But you do.

[spirithacker]

[There's a pause while Shinji fully digests this. Finally:]

thnx
i think that helped alot

[standalonehuman]

You're welcome.

I mean that. Welcome. Text me when you need it, okay?

I know things will get better, but there will also be days it gets bad again.

[spirithacker]

ok

i dont have anything 2 give back
unless you want videogame advice
or somebody 2 beat the hard levels 4 u

[standalonehuman]

Mmm. Keep being a good influence on my robot, how about that, if you want to do something back?

[spirithacker]

ez

it wants 2 be friends w/ my robot tank but idk if my robot can think

[standalonehuman]

I think the Tachikoma thinks it needs a positive role model to figure that out. It's kind of funny.

[spirithacker]

if it wants 2 big sibling my robot i dont mind
its kinda funny